


However Scary

by doodlemeimpressed



Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Boys Being Boys, Boys In Love, Canon Related, Character Study, Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/F, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Kinda, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Tags May Change, also the self-harm happens off screen, big joe is there being big joe, established relationship with hannah/cassidy tho, i would say established relationship with sean/finn but like...wheres the fun in that, smacking around kids, the usual, yeeeEEHAW
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-05-26
Packaged: 2020-03-08 18:10:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18899920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doodlemeimpressed/pseuds/doodlemeimpressed
Summary: Sean is struggling in more ways then one to deal with the pressure of his new life, taking care of Daniel and trying to work well in a high-pressure job was harder than his dad ever made it out to be. Luckily, he has enough caring friends to help take the load off him once and a while. But they aren't always there to help, and Sean doesn't always stay strong.





	However Scary

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [This Place Was Built To Keep Me Away](https://archiveofourown.org/works/18807226) by [elunablue](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elunablue/pseuds/elunablue). 



> So, i recently turned 16 and i realized how hard it must be to look after your 9 year old sibling, especially when 1.) you're on the run from the cops, 2.) your brother has supernatural powers and 3.) your last present-in-life guardian died. So i wrote this.
> 
> And even though I'm the little sibling, I know I would do anything for my big sister.
> 
> This takes place uhhhh in an AU before... lets say after episode 2 and a little after episode 3 starts, a little after the camp-fire scene. (?????)
> 
> Canon divergent obviously.
> 
>  
> 
> Also this probably has spelling errors, so my apologies and this first chapter took like 4 days to write so the next chapter will probably take more. Lol.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's tough being a 16 who was forcefully pushed into the roll of guardian, especially when you're on the run and your little brother has supernatural powers. But the show must go on, and so must normal life.

Sean woke up early that morning, leaving the tent he shared with his brother as quietly as he could, careful not to wake Daniel. The sun had just risen from the look of it and he was determined to have a good evening at work today. He let out a small, muffled laugh at that. It was weird to think of it like that, wasn't it? To consider working on an illegal pot farm a steady enough job to be called "work".

Most days he was convinced that if hedidn't have a good day at work that Big Joe would punch him, that he had to do amazing or else, but this wasn't out of fear of Merrill or his grunt, no, it was out of genuine resolve to enjoy something. Not that he enjoyed working there, who would? The way the leaves and the scissors cut into his hands, leaving cuts that burned all day and all night.

But he would make do with what he had, it was either "enjoy" work or get absolutely shit-faced on the weekends, something he couldn't really do as he was always at Daniel's beck and call.

As Sean headed towards the make-shift "kitchen" he began thinking about the cuts on his hands and started to message his palms, eventually he begun to subconsciously scratch at the side of his wrist. Under the weakly wrapped gauze and the sleeve of his hoodie he had hap-haphazardly pulled down, there was a cut there, not deep enough to scar, but he put it there.

Sean knew It was dumb to do and he regretted it, deep down. When he thought about it, he'd sometimes find himself imagining what a phony he must be, how it must look, to someone who had less then him. It reminded him of when Hannah had talked about fakers trying to be like the group, and how she despised nothing more than people who pretended to be like them.

Sean thought of why he did it. Why did he do it? He was never abused as a child, he had a loving family, someplace to eat, somewhere to sleep, he should be content with what he had and has now... _but yet..._

"Hey look who's finally awake," a voice suddenly spoke "welcome to the land of the living, Sean."

Sean's eyes, that were zoning out into nothing, finally focused on something. Hannah. She was standing next to Cassidy who had already made both of them a cup of coffee and was silently sipping hers, but nodded at Sean when Hannah alerted her of his presence. Lately Sean had noticed the dynamics and relationships of the group changing, he wouldn't say he was all too aware of it and so he gathered it happened over time when he wasn't looking. 

Sean had realized Finn stopped 'visiting' Hannah's tent.

At first, Sean just assumed it was because maybe they had an argument, and sure there was hate-sex but anger doesn't exactly "set the mood", but then he noticed Hannah and Cassidy hanging out more than usual, casually flirting with each other, or at least what looked like flirting to Sean. They even talked more during work hours.

So while Sean would've never guessed either of the girls to be the dating type, it sure seemed like they were to him.

" _Helloo_ , earth to Sean," Cassidy pulled him from his thoughts, "You there, sleepyhead?"

Sean shook his head, as if he was clearing his mind like it was an etch-a-sketch, "Yeah, I'm here, sorry Cass. Did you say something?"

"Yeah," Cassidy rolled her eyes, shoving a warm cup of coffee into his chest, "Breakfast?"

"I'm down, anything special today?"

But before Cassidy could begin, another voice (and person) cut into the conversation, "Well, my dear boy," Finn began with a thick Irish accent, throwing an arm over Sean's shoulder and dragging him over to a counter of cereals, "if you want to play it safe, you can have the classic 'Cheerios'" He said, throwing his other arm out in a dramatic display of the box "or, if you're feeling risky, you can have 'Lucky Charms' minus any of the good shit because _someone,"_ Finn paused, raising his voice and losing his accent "and I AM LOOKING AT YOU PENNY!-" Finn sighed and went back to his theatrics "ate all the marshmallows."

"Dude," Hannah suddenly spoke up "shut the fuck up, you're gonna wake Daniel." she said, scolding Finn from the side-lines. As a result, Finn suddenly threw his hands over his mouth and only removed them for a moment to mouth "oh shit" to the group but mostly to Sean. The 'sorry' implied.

The older Diaz had to hold back a chuckle at Finn's petty rage towards Penny and at Hannah's fear of him waking up Daniel. Only if she knew that Daniel slept like a log and Finn getting upset over cereal reminded Sean that Finn was a kid like any other. Though, as he thought about it, Sean did think that it made sense, the Lucky Charm marshmallows and the bland 'sweetness' of Cheerios were really the only sugar the group had.

He wondered if Penny had it all stashed away somewhere.

"So really," Finn said, bringing Sean back to the present and deciding to wrap up his display to the group, he finally let Sean free from his almost-headlock, "Its up to you how to _lavishly_ dine this morning."

Sean rolled his eyes, Cassidy finished her coffee. She sat it down in the sink turned to the two boys, "or you could just inject coffee into your veins, like the rest of us do." She laughed.

The older Diaz shook his head, grabbing a bowl and the box of Cheerios, "I'll think I'll pass with injecting anything into my veins for now, thanks" Sean said.

"Damn," Finn sighed dramatically, putting a hand over his eyes and leading on the counter, "and there goes my romantic date idea of shooting up ecstasy with you while sitting by the lake-side."

* * *

 It only took a few minutes before Sean had finished his breakfast, cleaned his dish and headed to wake Daniel up. It would be an hour or so until Big Joe showed up to take the group to the farm and Sean wanted to give Daniel some time to wake up fully and prepare for the day. He knew how hard it was for him to wake up early and go to work, so he didn't want to think how taxing it was on his little brother.

Sometimes Sean thought about this, their life now and all that's happened. He thought about how he got to have a normal childhood, or at least some of it. Sean was still only 16 after all. But Daniel, his childhood was cut short, 9 and on the run. At the beginning, they were hungry and sad most days, Sean had to do things he wasn't proud of, compromise his morality. All for the sake of 'surviving'. Sean knew it was rough for him, but he was older, tougher, smarter. But to Daniel? Well, it was probably the closest thing to hell Daniel would experience.

"Hey, up and at 'em" Sean spoke softly, sticking his head through the tent door and nudging Daniel in his sleep.

Daniel moved, but alas stayed put.

"Come on, Daniel, I already let you sleep in as is. You have to get up now."

Daniel groaned, and Sean managed to make out a 'no' from his little brother. He stifled a laugh, it was nice to know even though their situation was hard, Daniel was still able to be a stubborn child. It gave Sean a semblance of hope, but sadly, also a headache.

"You do this every day, you know its coming," Sean says, now mock-pulling at Daniel's sleeping back, enough to disturb him but (hopefully) not anger him "imagine how tired you'll be tonight and how easily you'll fall asleep after working."

Daniel slowly rolled over, still laying down but now making eye contact with his older brother. He didn't say anything for a moment, until,

"But look at my hands, Sean"

"What?"

"My hands," Daniel says, raising his hands up to Sean and _god_ , he sounds so tired, so broken. Sean can feel his heart tightening at the heart-wrenching sight. Daniels hands are red, and the cuts on his palms look like they're moments away from bleeding. "They hurt, please, don't make me work."

"Daniel, I– you know I can't do anything. What would you even do here, you can't stay by yourself. You have to go.  _We have to go."_

And Daniel, he doesn't say anything, but he looks like he just might collapse, either from exhaustion or distress. Sean can't tell.

'Don't make me work.' Sean hears in his head. He wants Daniel to get upset, so he can stop having to be the doting old brother, so he can be angry and selfish but...

Sean can't look at this.

"Okay, _enano,_  I'll..." He speaks, and Sean doesn't realize it until he does, but he's been holding a sob in his throat, "I'll figure something out."

 _'I'll try to at least.'_ he thinks, but doesn't say.

And with that, Sean sharply pulls his head out of the tent and backs away from it. He takes a deep breath and heads towards the center of the camp, the unlit campfire, subconsciously scratching his wrist in worry.

 When he finally does make it to the campfire, all he can do it sit down and put his head in his hands. Sean mentally scolds himself for making a promise to Daniel that he can't keep, he just couldn't look at his little brother any longer, he deserved more. He deserved better.

"Ay, Seanie-boy," Finn spoke suddenly, plopping himself down next to Sean. His voice was in an (almost) over-the-top chipper tone that violently contrasted Sean's current mental state. When the older Diaz finally looked up from his hands, he noticed Finn searching for someone, "the little man not up?" Finn eventually asked.

"He–" Sean paused, his throat aching. _Fuck_. Why was he getting emotional over this? Wounds heal. Daniel would be fine eventually, but they need this steady money now. Sean thought that maybe he should just go over there, pull Daniel out of bed and force feed him. He had to do something. Merrill just wouldn't let one of his workers off so easy. He–

And Sean almost didn't feel it, it was so delicate, but Finn had softly placed a hand on his thigh. Steadying his thoughts a bit.

"Hey, you all good there, Sean?"

Sean shook his head and put it back in his hands, rubbing his palms into his eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"Daniel– he– his fucking hands they–" Sean was shaking, but he took a sharp breath in before momentarily looking up at Finn and continuing, "his hands are all fucking torn up, man. It's like they're gonna start bleeding any second..."

Finn looked sympathetic, but didn't say anything, patiently making sure Sean was done before he did. While he waited, Finn slowly moved his hand from Sean's thigh, up to the back of the boy's neck, holding it there supportingly.

"He can't work like that, Finn,  _he just fucking cant. It's cruel, I won't—_ "

"I'll do it then." Finn interrupted.

Suddenly, Sean felt the pit of his stomach get cold, he wasn't a hundred percent sure what he'd just heard. He abruptly pulled his head up, staring at the other boy for a moment before speaking.

"What?"

"I said," Finn paused, moving his hand to place it on Sean's shoulder and looking directly at the other boy, "I'll do it. I'll do his work."

Sean was speechless, what was he supposed to say? He still wasn't exactly sure what Finn meant by that, should he say 'thank you?".

"All Merrill cares about is progressing, not falling behind 'schedule'." Finn continued, pulling Sean back into the present "He doesn't care  _who_ does  _what,_ he just cares that it gets done. Plus," he paused, shrugging and smiling "in comparison to what I do, it's not like Daniel has much work anyway."

Sean pulled himself away from Finn's grasp. For a brief moment Finn looked hurt at that, like Sean had just insulted him.

"You're not screwing with me?" Sean said, " _dios mío,"_ the older Diaz inhaled deeply, standing up from his seat in shock "you're serious."

 "Of course I'm serious," Finn laughed to himself like it was obvious "anything for my _favorite_ bum." The other boy winked.

Sean waited for a moment, waited for the 'sike!' but it never came. He allowed himself to destress a bit as he sat down, however, he started to shake his head, "no, no wait, you can't do that. You already have so much responsibility at Merrill's, I can't ask you to do that."

"You didn't." Finn said finally. It felt like the end of the conversation but then Finn spoke up again, "Sean, I know how much _you_ care about Daniel, and  _you_ know how much _I_ care about him. I'm not gonna let the little man hurt himself over something fuckin' dumb like weed farming."

And as he so enjoyed doing, Finn placed a hand on top of Sean's knee, causing the older Diaz's head to shoot up and focus on him. Finn looked deep into the other boys eyes, not breaking eye contact as he spoke, voice serious.

"I want to do this, Sean. If not for Daniel, then for you. I see how hard you work for your brother, _we all_ see how hard you work for him. You're a good brother but you're going to burn out if you keep pushing yourself. You've both been through so much a deserve a break."

All Sean could do was stare. This would probably be one of the very rare moments he saw Finn's serious side. He sighed and closed his eyes for a moment, trying to think of the best decision to make here. and shook his head

"Okay," Sean said, opening his eyes to see Finn just beginning to celebrate, " _If_ i consider this, and that's a big _if..._ " The older Diaz stated firmly and pointedly, slowly watching as Finn's celebration fizzled out before it even began, however the other boy still remained focused on the conversation, "Daniel can't stay here by himself, who's gonna stay with him-"

"Penny, definitely" Finn said strongly, nearly cutting Sean's own words off. The other boy had clearly thought _this_ part through.

Sean raised an eyebrow, "Oh really?" he adjusted in his chair, now sitting up straight, interested to see where Finn was taking this exactly, "and why is that?"

"Motherfucker ate all my marshmallows," Finn snorted " _obviously_ "

Just as Sean was about to speak again he was interrupted by a loud honk followed by the usual, but indecipherable, yell from Big Joe notifying the group it was time to get back to work. Damn, had time really passed that fast? Had he really been talking with Finn for a whole hour? He watched the other drifters begin walking towards the Meetup spot  as Big Joe  hollered something again. 

In the back of his mind, Sean wondered what Big Joe actually yelled or if he was just going back to his bigfoot roots as everyone suspected, maybe the others in the group, the ones who had been here longer, knew for sure. 

Contented with everything he had said, Sean exhaled and stretched once he finally stood up. The feeling of Finn's hand on his knee quickly becoming a ghost as the other boy pulled himself away and gave Sean one finally squeeze on the shoulder.

"Don't worry 'bout it, sweetheart. I'll convince Penny to stay," Finn winked, "after all, you know how charming I can be." And with that he set off towards Penny, who was just now heading towards the group from the kitchen.

Sean blamed his sharp turn away from Finn on the fact that they were all heading to work, he blamed it on the fact that everyone had already gone and he wanted to catch up, on the fact that he'd been late before and didn't want to be again.

He didn't blame it, however, on the very real fact that his face was getting warmer and that his heart was beating faster, that when Finn winked at him, his stomach turned upside-down and his hands grew sweaty.

What a mess he was becoming.


End file.
